There can't be more then two Kirkland's in a room
by TheAwesomeMind
Summary: This is just a bunch of stories about what happens when the UK siblings, and sometimes the Republic of Ireland, are in the same room together for long periods of time.
1. Chapter 1 America

Chp. 1- America's Mistake

* * *

America was super hyped about hosting his first world conference. Yeah, he had been a country representing himself for a while, but he never really got around to it. Though he was excited he was terribly unprepared. In fact he had to text the address of the building and the time the meeting started to every country because he forgot about it in all the excitement. He texted England lastly. Due to this he became lazy with his texting quickly and England was used with extreme text slang.

_Yo UK, the met strts 7. Giv me sec 2 txt rections- A_

_America, firstly please text using real words, secondly do you want the whole UK to come? -England_

_Yeah dud, I do. Y wod I wnt hlf- A_

Thinking back on it, it all made sense now. At the time he assumed it to be British humor or something, but now seeing this he understood. He just wondered why everyone was looking at them like that.

* * *

*Later*

America smiled, pushing open both doors dramatically prepared for an awesome hero speech, purposely coming five minutes late. "THE HERO IS HERE!" He shouted happily but stopped noticing an empty seat besides his own.

"Where's England?" He pouted slightly and everyone just sort of shrugged, unsure, except one country who was smirking, glancing down at his phone.

This country was one of England's closest friends, Portugal.

"Excuse me, América? While inviting the Reino Unido you specifically asked for Inglaterra not just the Reino Unido correct?" He chuckled and America frowned.

"Dude, speak American! I'm asking about ENGLAND not Reno Uni-do or whatever!" America said confused and Spain translated.

"He wants to know if you asked England himself to represent or just the UK in general. To summarise it." Spain answered and America shot a confused look.

Germany groaned slightly. "You don't meant to say...?"

Portugal nodded "Tanto a Inglaterra e seus irmãos estão chegando." Portugal spook.

Just as America was about to question what Portugal was saying, loud shots could be heard from outside the room.

"WE'RE BARELY LATE!" "Barely late my arse! We are at least ten minutes! Wanker" "tawelu i lawr i chi dau, Rwy'n eithaf siwr y gansen adeilad cyfan yma i chi." "Wales, I think it is a bit late fer them to calm down." "nad oes neb yn gofyn i chi Gweriniaeth!" "Wales! Don't be rude!"

Everyone watched the door as the five voices became closer and the doors opened to reveal five countries, one of them being England, and four being unknown.

"Sorry we're late. Scotland lost his car keys." England said and America looked over each of the four people standing next to him.

On his left was a longer ad darker haired version of him that was slightly bulkier and shorter as well, but other then that no differences.

On his left was a pair of ginger twins. One was female with her hair in two braids, and the other was a male with his hair neatly gelled to a small side mohawk type thing. They were about equal sized to the Brit.

And finally, there was HIM. America had off feeling about him at first sight. He had dark blood red hair, seemed to tower over his siblings, and had thicker yet equally messy hair as England.

"Umm Britain, who are they?" America asked tilting his head to the side.

"Depends on 'o yer talkin' to. Are ye talkin' to me, Cymru, er Albion?" The red head asked and Englad sighed.

"America, this is Scotland," he pointed to the red head "Wales," he pointed to the other him, "Northern Ireland," he pointed to the female twin, "And the Republic of Ireland." He finished pointing to the male twin.

"Cool! Nice to meet you bro's, you're Britain's older siblings righT?" He asked and both Wales and Scotland looked very annoyed.

"Caniatâd i ladd y idiot pan mae'n troi o gwmpas?" Wales asked and all four siblings smiled, being the only one'a to understand him. "Later Cymru." England said and the Welsh nation smiled.

"I thought his name was Wales?" America asked tilting his head as England took a seat, his siblings pulling up chairs they borrowed from other nations next to him.

-Twenty Minutes Later*

"sugno fy ceiliog i chi ffycin bastard Americanaidd!" Wales yelled as he and America rolled on the floor, Wales throwing punches, America just trying to pin him.

Meanwhile, North Ireland started a fight with the Republic of Ireland and when those two fought they had no boundaries in public. That is why the table they were all sitting it was currently being smashed.

"ENGLAND DO SOMETHING ABOUT YOUR SIBLINGS!" Germany demanded after trying to stop them and failing.

Saddly England was busy debating with Scotland so he didn't care nor notice.

Portugal stood up smirking at the German. "Lunch Break." He called and they all stopped as if that the most important announcement ever made.

As soon as England's brothers and sister dragged him out of the room, probably to a pub, everyone glared at America.

"This is why no one invites all of the Uk, America." France stated

* * *

Translations provided by Google-

Portuguese

Reino Unido-uk

Tanto a Inglaterra e seus irmãos estão chegando- Both England and his siblings are coming.

Welsh

tawelu i lawr i chi dau, Rwy'n eithaf siwr y gansen adeilad cyfan yma i chi- calm down you two, I'm pretty sure the whole building can here you

nad oes neb yn gofyn i chi Gweriniaeth!- no one asked you Republic!

Caniatâd i ladd y idiot pan mae'n troi o gwmpas- Permission to kill the idiot when it turns around

sugno fy ceiliog i chi ffycin bastard Americanaidd- Suck my cock you fucking bastard American


	2. France invites the UK over

France was known in the UK. Both good and bad. In fact, he was probably the first one to learn lesson of not inviting the whole UK.

When the siblings had first become the 'UK' he decided to help break the ice between them. 'And what better way then a dinner?!' he had thought. 'Besides, what better way to get closer to Angleterre?' He chuckled in his mind as he made dinner.

* * *

France hurried over to the door as soon as he heard a knock at it.

As soon as he opened the door he knew the night would be fulfilling night.  
Scotland and Englad were arguing, Wales was just glaring a both, and Southern Ireland was trying to calm both down. Northern Ireland head rolling her eyes at this, only being 13 in looks.

They all stopped since they realised France had opened the door.

"'AYE Froggie!" Scotland smiled hugging him roughly.

"Écosse, it haz been far to long wee?"

"Aye is 'as!" He replied walking into Frances home he owned at the time. England followed behind.

"Angleterre, don't I get a hello?" France teased

"Fuck off." was all he heard in response.

"Byddaf yn lladd chi un diwrnod Broga-bastard." Wales said coolly. France looked at him slightly confused and afraid.  
Wales chuckled slightly moving after his brothers, France giving him a slightly dirty look.

"Sorry about my brothers." South Ireland said sincerely to France. France smiled slightly in respounce.

"It iz alright Irlande du Sud! Come in I 'ave wine in the cabinets if you would like to 'elp yourself." He responded and South nodded walking in dragging Northern Ireland with him.

* * *

Dinner did not go as France had hoped.

As soon as dinner had started things took a wrong and weird turn.

Needles to say everyone dug into the meal France prepared, but Scotland ate slower then true rest for once.

"Neit yer bes' work Froggie." Scotland told him

"I think it tastes fine." England retorted

"Really? You like it Angleterre?!" France asked surprised, when suddenly a fork hit his face from across the table where Wales sat.

"Stop cellwair caru gyda fy mrawd!" Wales growled  
"Wales! That was rude and he was not flirting." South said

"And learn to speak another language why yer at it." Scotland smirked.

"What? 'ow can you even unerztand what 'e iz zaying?" France asked extremely confused.

"He is speaking Welsh ye boggin!" North said to him and South glared at her.

"At least try to be polite North." He said

France then decided to ignore the arguing Irish siblings and focus on a glaring Enlgand as Scotland and Wales faught.

"Zo Angleterre, 'ow would you like a tour of ze place?" France suggested trying seduce the slightly younger nation.  
Suddenly a knife logged itself into France's shoulder making the Frenchie squeal.

"WALES!" South shouted

" yr oedd ef! yr oedd yn ceisio cael yn y gwely â Lloegr" Wales shouted

"Donnae bust a vein. Froggie woos flirten' wit England wit' fair warnin'." Scotland said pulling out the knife.

"I agree with Sheep Shagger and the Scot." England said and South glared.

"WOOT IS THA' SUPOSED TER MEAN?!" Scotland growled at his younger sibling.

"I DIZAGREE!" France said glaring, tears in his eyes.  
"Suck it up Froggie! Small knife te the shoulder tha' it!" Scotland said.

England chuckled at this making France glare.

"Scotland! Stop setting a bad example!" South said

"Oh why donnae ye just go drink some beer?" Scorland said to him.

Suddeny the table broke. It litterly broke right in half as South stood up slamming his palms down on the table, thus breaking it.

Suddenly South tackled Scotland gripping his throat tightly.

"Five pounds on South!" Nothern Ireland shouted as France watched in horror as the two siblings recked his beloved home. Scotland was now fighting off South by body slamming him against anything he could.

"No way, 20 pounds on Scotland." England said and Wales turned to him.

"Rydw i ar ochr yr Alban hefyd." Wales said and France snapped.

"Apprendre une autre langue!" He said and Wales rolled his eyes.  
"Don't talk to my brother like that Frog-face!" England snapped and gave him a real rough punch to the face and then stomach.

"Dyna'r ffordd Lloegr!" Wales shouted and soon France blacked out.

France doesn't remember much after that, but what he does remember is waking up with bruises, a nearly destroyed home, and four brothers and a sister drinking tea together.

"Thanks fer 'aven us over Froggie. Ends up this migh' jist work out!" Scotland grinned.

* * *

Side note- England is slightly out of character because I don't see him to be in to high of a gentlemanly stag but learning. That is why he is so out of it. Also for this one few translations are need that is why I will only be translating some things.

French-

Apprendre une autre langue!=Learn a different language

Welsh-

Byddaf yn lladd chi un diwrnod Broga-bastard= I will kill you one-day frog bastard.

yr oedd ef! yr oedd yn ceisio cael yn y gwely â Lloegr= he! he was trying to get in bed with England

Rydw i ar ochr yr Alban hefyd= Im also on the Scottish side

Dyna'r ffordd Lloegr= That's the way England


	3. Spain goes to England's house

Spain meets the UK siblings~

* * *

The UK was going threw sort of a rough patch with there family. The reality of South, now the Republic of Ireland, leaving them had hit them. Not too well either.

That is why Portugal decided to come over, being a welcomed family friend, to make sure they were all okay and coping well.

Spain was a different story though.

The only reason he came to the Uk was because his brother Portugal had work to do and he didn't want Portugal around that damned England. Otherwise, he's be with Romano or in the tomatoe fields!

Spain knocked on the door of the Kirkland residence and about two minutes later a man who looked very similar to England, but had darker and slightly longer hair opened the door.

"Beth ydych chi eisiau?" The guy asked, it then clicked in Spain's mind.

That was Wales. Spain sadly didn't speak Welsh.

"I am here for my hermano. Portugal." He sighed hoping the nation spoke English.

"Dewch ymlaen yn, yr wyf yn amau ei fod yn gadael yn fuan." Wales said letting a confused Spaniard in.

"OI! WALES 'HO'S AT TER DOOR?!" Someone shouted and a red head wearing a...skirt walked in.

"Sbaen, brawd Portiwgal." Wales rebounded

"Mm woot does 'e want?" Scotland asked ignoring the Spainiard.

"Nid wyf yn gwybod." Wales responded simply.

"Woot do ye mean ye donnae know?!" Scotland growled clutching some liquor tightly in his hand.

"Doeddwn i ddim yn wir yn gwrando. Yn ôl pob tebyg yma ar gyfer naill ai yn Lloegr neu Bortiwgal." Wales replied rolling his eyes.

"Well? 're ye 'ere fer Port er nae?" Scotland asked Spain.

"Sí." Spain responded.

"OI ENGLAND! PORTUGAL! SPAIN DECIDED TO DROPP BY!" He shouted and red ginger girl came down the stairs of only about seventeen.

"They went out ten minutes ago! Portugal wanted to cheer England up and get him out of the house!" She said.

"Aye, I forgot. Thanks Nerth." Scotland said and she nodded skipping off.

'That must have been England's younger sister Northern Ireland.' Spain thought.

"Looks like yer gonna either 'ave ter wait 'ere or come back later." Scotland said to Spain.

Spain thought for a moment.

He never did get the chance to meet England's family when they were married, or the multiple times they were dating. And he always did wonder why...

"If it wouldn't be too much to ask, I would like to wait sí." Spain said and Scotland nodded.

"Byddaf yn mynd yn gwneud cinio. Ydych chi'n gwybod ble Lloegr stashes y gwenwyn?" Wales asked.

"In the spice cabinet. Near the sal'" Scotland said.

Wales nodded and walked away.

"Lunch will be ready in a bit. Wh. Donnae show ye ter the livin' room." Scotland said and showed Spain threw the same door Wales went threw.

The living room was average sized and had a door connecting to the kitchen.

Scotland sat down on the couch and Spain followed, sitting down next to him.

"So, ah where is Southern Ireland?" Spain asked awkwardly forgetting that he had become independent two days ago and moved out.

Scotland glared.

"'e left the UK." He said and took a sip of the liquor he was holding still.

"Lo siento, olvidé!" Spain said hurriedly.

"'s okay. At least net all the fae lef' the UK." Scotland said

"...What?" Spain asked

"The fairies. Most of 'em left when South did too." Scotland exclaimed

"Fairies?" Spain asked, hoping he was joking.

"Ye 'eard." Scotland said challengingly, as if daring him to say something stupid.

"..." Spain sat their wondering if all of the UK family was insane.

"WALES 'URRY WIT' TER FOOD!" Scotland shouted.

"One second!" Two voices answered and Northern Ireland and Wales came out with the food...if that was what you would call it anyway..

North gave Spain his and sat down on the arm chair with hers and Wales did the same but sat on the other side of Scotland.

Spaithere ally started regretting his desision on staying.

"What is this?" Spain said poking it with his fork.

"Haggis." Scotland replied eating his lunch along with his siblings.

Spain had to force himself to take two bites before he nearly threw up. The food tastes worse then dirt!

"Ni all Sbaen ymddangos i ddal ei fwyd i lawr." Wales smirkedScotland and North looked up from their nearly finished plates.

"Don't ye like it? It's a Scottish dish ye know." Scotland informed

"Oh it's uhhh..." Spain took another slow bite.

"Oh mi Dios, esto es peor que la comida de Inglaterra!" Spain said gagging.

Scotland laughed, a laugh Spain only had heard from one other person.

"Shut up skirt wearing bastard!" Spain said his pirate side coming out.

Suddenly he felt something collide with his face and he hit the ground.

"IT'S A KILT!" Scotland growled.

Suddenly the sound of a door shutting filled the home.

"BACK!" England shouted and walked into the room with Portugal following close behind.

They both stopped seeing Spain on the ground with a bloody nose.

"Scotland what the fuck did you do?!" England glared.

"'E CALLED ME KILT A SKIRT!" Scotland said angrily.

"Oh bloody fucking great! We're going to start ANOTHER war! OH AND DOES WALES WANNA BECOME INDEPENDENT TOO?!" He said finally having an outlet for his anger.

"Aye wassnae starten' no war!" Scotland defended and North smirked.

"You punched him in the face and not to mention what Wales did." North said and Wales glared at her for telling.

"Rydych yn unig genfigennus nad oes gennych draig!" Wales snapped at her.

"Please, why would so be jealous of your dragon?! I have leprechauns." She said seriously.

Spain looked around to see if he was the only one worried about the mental health lacking in the room.

Suddenly Scotland and England were on the ground next to him fighting.

"Portugal it's time to go!" Spain shouted crawling past them.

"Espanha?" Portugal asked confused.

"We're going home." Spain said standing and dragging Portugal out of the house as quickly as he could.

"BYE GUYS!" Portugal shouted and the door slammed.

* * *

Translations-

Beth ydych chi eisiau?- What do you want?

Hermano- brother

Dewch ymlaen yn, yr wyf yn amau ei fod yn gadael yn fuan.- Come on in, I doubt he will be leaving soon

Sbaen, brawd Portiwgal- Spain, Portugal's brother

Doeddwn i ddim yn wir yn gwrando. Mae'n debyg naill ai yma ar gyfer Lloegr neu Bortiwgal- I was not really listening. Probably here for either England or Portugal

Byddaf yn mynd yn gwneud cinio. Ydych chi'n gwybod ble Lloegr stashes y gwenwyn- I'll go make dinner. Do you know where England put the poison?

Ni all Sbaen ymddangos i ddal ei fwyd i lawr.- Spain can not seem to keep his food down.

Oh mi Dios, esto es peor que la comida de Inglaterra.- Oh my God, this is worse than the food of England.

Rydych yn unig genfigennus nad oes gennych draig- You are just jealous you do not have a dragon!

Note- If you have any requests for who meets the UK brothers for the first time or has some of them in the same room for the first time or scenarios for them just leave it in the comments and I'll take it under consideration.


End file.
